fifthcurriculum | INTRO LOG

[Yeah, that's a big one. And knowing what he does about Ryan, he has no idea how to react at first. But then a slow grin spreads across his face, until he's all teeth and glittering eyes.]

Holy shit. Holy shit. You have got hidden depths, man.

[He can't help but laugh at that, another one that's almost audible, as his face flushes a little more pink.]

Nobody's a wallflower a hundred percent of the time, right? I'm just- picky about my reasons.

[Those are almost annoyingly charming. He looks away, amused and mildly irritated, and lets go of his legs to stretch them out in front of him, feet hanging off the edge.]

And horniness apparently tops the list. Better hope you never meet him, he'll have you snared in seconds.

Excuse you, it was curiosity, not hormones.

[...yeah, no, it was a healthy dose of both. The reminder makes him curious, though, and his grin fades to a more thoughtful look as he peers at John.]

-so if I should be keeping an eye out, who is this guy?

Curiosity. Right. Just wondering what it'd be like to fuck in a classroom after hours. Almost scientific if you think about it that way.

[He's having way too much fun with this. An easy target who rolls with it is new in his life, and it actually blunts his edge a little.

But yes, there's that reminder, and his brows pinch down sharply. Like a fast-brewing storm.]

Petre Dodrescu. About my height, blonde, some kind of accent. Dresses like a - [That thought's headed off right at the pass.] - fancy.

(how's that for a pickup line. 'let me kiss you for science'.)

[Another little twitch of a grin at that thought-- but when John answers, it instantly disappears. Everything does, really: Ryan's thoughts go blank as he just sort of stares over at John, blinking.

There's no way, alright. There are just... two alarmingly similar guys who are both named Petre, obviously, that's got to be it. He definitely did not do anything with the same guy John says is fucking with him.

God, what is his life.]

No, wait, he said he knew you. [John hasn't noticed the reaction yet. He also doesn't mention that it was mainly to rub in the fact that Ryan appeared to have a crush on John, since they're calling truce over that.

Then he glances over, curious at the lack of reaction. Then confused.

Then horrified.]

Oh fuck, Ryan, you're not that stupid. Tell me you're not that stupid.

Edited 2014-09-20 04:40 (UTC)

I- I didn't know, okay-

(I didn't know he seemed fine and he was cute it just happened)

[That deer in the headlights look stays plastered on his face for a few more moments before Ryan bites his lip, folds his arms across his chest.]

...he suggested it might keep my head quieter. And he was attractive, and he was offering, and I hadn't ever-- I didn't know, John.

Oh, cute. That's a great line. Might as well have been kissing for science.

[He's up and off the bed, pacing irritably.]

This is because I said it. It was a joke, he brought you up like he was trying to make me jealous, and I said you two could ride off into the sunset for all I cared. Or something. Because he pissed me off. I didn't mean it!

It wasn't you!

[It comes out with more force than he means it to, partly to reassure himself.]

He offered the first time we met, okay, and he wanted me to wait. Think about it, come back after a couple days. It didn't have anything to do with you, it couldn't have--

[...wait.]

...what d'you mean he was trying to make you jealous, the hell would he be using me for that?

And that wasn't weird to you? Some random guy picking you up the first time you met? He really did see you coming.

[His hands ball into fists. He's angry on Ryan's behalf, really, but it's ending up directed at him because - well, that's what John knows how to do.]

No, no, now that makes total sense. He had you lined up, and he's so convinced I secretly want him that he figured it'd just eat me up knowing that there was someone else who could take my place. Jesus, he's fucking insane, you have to see that.

[Having it directed at him just makes him assume John's blaming him for that behavior- his brows furrow into a deeper frown, and he's curling up against himself much like John had when he first settled onto the bed.]

I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was supposed to second-guess anyone who has any interest in me! Must've forgotten nobody actually would, what was I fucking thinking, right?

[Ryan tugs his glasses off and reaches up to rub at his face, huffing out a frustrated breath.]

I'm not saying I don't believe you, okay, I'm saying I didn't have any reason to suspect anything. I don't know what you want from me, John.

That is not what I meant. Don't make it personal. He's a fucking creep, I just don't see -

[Okay, this is getting nowhere. He's not admitting how he really feels about this - the actual fear he has for Ryan - when they barely know one another and it'll probably sound just as creepy. With a sharp breath of his own, he stops and turns to face Ryan more seriously.]

All he wants is to use people. That's it. No one is gonna change that. Use them and crush them. Just - don't be any more stupid than you have already.

(I'm making it personal? You're the one getting mad at me for it--)

[It's more distressed than angry, and Ryan's obviously tense when John turns to face him, clinging tightly to himself. There's a little flash of that previous irritation at his last words, but he nods anyway, not relaxing.]

I know it wasn't going to be anything serious, I'm not stupid. And I'm not doing it again.

[His shoulders slowly start to drop, and then his fists unclench.]

I'm not mad at you.

[This time he actually falls backward onto the bed, lying with his legs draped over the edge, scowling up at the ceiling.]

I'm actually pretty close to going crazy. So whatever, take or leave all of this shit.

[He's quiet for a bit, not quite ready to keep going or to start unfolding himself- and he's still not ready for the latter by the time he answers.]

I do believe you, okay? I'm not gonna let it happen again if he's been doing all of this shit to you. But I didn't know about it then and you were pissy about it happening and-

[There's another short sound, barely audible- distressed instead of amused, this time.]

I'm sorry.

You're here. [He drapes an arm over his eyes.] If Petre was here, I would've given him shit. But don't stay away because of me, for god's sake, do it for yourself. There's better here, there's gotta be.

[An unspoken you deserve better.]

I know.

[Pointedly not looking back over at him, trying to avoid giving him the wrong idea about that answer. He's some of the only good company Ryan's had since he got here; he's also totally out of the question, nevermind that they're not even close.]

[He's the one who finally rolls his head over to look at Ryan, mouth hitching into a slight smile.]

So no stalker advice, huh. Fat load of good you did me.

[That finally gets him back out of the tense little shell, reaching over to shove at John's shoulder with a roll of his eyes.]

Thought you didn't want advice. This isn't therapy, right?

More like a support group. [It takes work, but he keeps the bitterness out of his voice.

And then, unexpectedly, he's sharing. The deep down problems, the crux of the matter.]

Sometimes he just turns around and says he wants to be friends. That's it. Try to change his rules for it and it's all off again, but - last year I thought we were. Right up until he turned on me. But it's my fault we can't be friends, 'cause causing some shit around here works for me but being the scapegoat every time doesn't. Having him pick at me for personal shit and know just want to say to get what he wants doesn't work.

I know shitall about friends, but that's not what it'd be about for me. But shit, he makes it all sound magical for a few seconds.

It's not what it's supposed to be about.

[Quiet, but firm.]

I know you know he's being manipulative, but that definitely isn't 'being friends'. Not even if you stretch it pretty far. And there's better here than that.

[After a pause he huffs out a short, breathless laugh.]

This's more like it, honestly- I mean, I know you said you don't do this, but just. Talking about things like that. Hanging out.

[You deserve better. That's what he'd meant when he said that to Ryan. Having it thrown back makes him wonder if he knew, because John just gave him righteous shit for, essentially, being a bit irresponsible. He doubts Ryan has a lot of positive opinions on what he does and doesn't deserve in a friend.]

Hey. I know you said it's not getting serious. [He look up at Ryan intensely, darkly.] Just - if it starts to sound too good, and definitely way fucking better than he can offer? Don't forget this. Don't miss the manipulation 'cause it's happening to you.

[Now it's a bit more clear that he was worried. One silly afternoon spent together, nearly getting in trouble and nearly fighting and mostly just laughing at stupid things, and John's concerned for his welfare. There is some kind of draw there, although he doesn't know what it was for Petre yet.

He isn't entirely sure what it is for him yet, just that it's there.]

More of when we met, less of the losing my mind over a psycho, and maybe I could do friends.

[... was that an offer?]

[The concern there softens some of the irritation of feeling scolded for what he'd done. Having someone worry about him is new, at least from someone around his own age-- sometimes adults worry, teachers do, but not people like John. Ryan's the one who does all the fretting, always.]

I'll keep it in mind. Promise.

[And then he manages a little grin, adds:]

Not losing your mind's all up to you, I don't do that kind of telepathy- but I think I could manage more of when we met. Deal?

[He offers a hand out to John, one brow quirked.]

[He props himself up on his elbows, eyeing Ryan's hand. This isn't signing his life away, like it would be with Petre - if they have a falling out, they'll just ignore one another, not launch into some bloody war for one another's sanity - but agreeing to a friendship still feels strange. He doesn't know if that's how it works or if they're just supposed to happen. If he prefers the clarity or not.

Finally, he sits up and shakes Ryan's hand with a surprisingly tentative smile.]

Yeah. Deal.

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