[There it all is, mixed together into one moment. He's angry, and harsh in his anger, but also gentle in his actions - of course he wouldn't risk their friendship. Of course he wouldn't try asking when John was upset. Ryan is nice, considerate, places himself below others.
When John said there was nothing wrong with Ryan, what he really meant was that if the situation made any sense at all, Ryan would've been the right choice. John just doesn't have the same gravitational pull toward kind, gentle treatment, because it's so unfamiliar that he trusts it even less than outright cruelty. That's not Ryan's fault, or his mistake, but it's why this didn't happen immediately.
It's happening now, though. At the very least, he's getting up on his knees and settling himself in front of Ryan, sliding off his glasses and setting them on the bedside table before turning back to him.]
Your eyes are really green. [An idle thought, somewhere between accidental and intentionally sent.] And you know I've always liked your hair.
[That's where he starts; after an aborted attempt to run his fingers through it, he just starts to play with it again, catching the ends of stray curls between his fingertips and rubbing gently.]
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When John said there was nothing wrong with Ryan, what he really meant was that if the situation made any sense at all, Ryan would've been the right choice. John just doesn't have the same gravitational pull toward kind, gentle treatment, because it's so unfamiliar that he trusts it even less than outright cruelty. That's not Ryan's fault, or his mistake, but it's why this didn't happen immediately.
It's happening now, though. At the very least, he's getting up on his knees and settling himself in front of Ryan, sliding off his glasses and setting them on the bedside table before turning back to him.]
Your eyes are really green. [An idle thought, somewhere between accidental and intentionally sent.] And you know I've always liked your hair.
[That's where he starts; after an aborted attempt to run his fingers through it, he just starts to play with it again, catching the ends of stray curls between his fingertips and rubbing gently.]